


Stay

by alexandermylove



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, BAMF Alec Lightwood, Gen, How Do I Tag, M/M, POV Multiple, Post-Season/Series 02, catarina is such a good friend, jace is sad, some descriptions of extreme pain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-16
Updated: 2017-12-16
Packaged: 2019-02-13 02:09:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12973401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alexandermylove/pseuds/alexandermylove
Summary: Alec gets injured and Jace feels it. Everyone is struggling and trying to keep him alive.





	Stay

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sirknightmordred](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sirknightmordred/gifts).



> Hello my friends! By the angel, it's been a long fucking time since I've written anything. 
> 
> This is for the Malec Hiatus Fic Exchange. I got sirknightmordred and for some reason, I was drawn to the prompt that had the least amount of malec in it: "Alec gets injured and Jace feels it. Everyone is struggling and trying to keep him alive. Especially Magnus." 
> 
> There is definitely some malec in here but it's not the main point of the story. 
> 
> This story is told in both Alec's and Jace's POVs so that will be interesting I hope. 
> 
> I'm a little out of practice but I'd love to hear what y'all have to say about this! 
> 
> P.S. the title comes from the song 'Stay' by Hurts (if you listen to it while reading just ignore all the romantic stuff lmao)

Alec had been getting ready for his date with Magnus. It had only been a couple weeks since they had gotten back together and things were just as great, if not better than they had been before. Magnus hadn't told him where they were going, only that Alec needed to dress for the heat. So Alec was standing in front of his dreadfully bare closet when the control room sensor alarm had gone off: minor level demons only a couple of blocks away from the Institute. He left his bedroom to go to his office to shut it off and scrolled through the available personnel in the building. A lot of people had already left for the night and those remaining were already assigned to duties like cleaning or cataloging or watching the maps.

He scrolled down to his siblings and Clary and sent alerts out to them. They had already been out on mission this week but it was such an easy job they would be in and out without even breaking a sweat.

By the time he made it to the weapons room for debriefing, Jace and Izzy were already there strapping on seraph blades and drawing runes onto each other. Alec pulled out his own stele from his weapons belt and walked up behind his parabatai. Jace stuck out his arm without even having to turn his head and Alec began drawing runes for speed, strength, and surefootedness.

“Where’s Clary?” He asked, scanning the room but not seeing her bright hair.

“She’s not coming.” Izzy supplied from over near the long swords.

“Why?”

“She’s busy with Simon,” Jace said, turning around.

Alec sighed. He could pull someone off of weapons cleaning or control room but it would take too long to find the right person to fill out the team.

He began to unbutton his shirt and as soon as it was off, he felt the familiar burn of his brother drawing runes onto his side. His muscles began to tingle as the runes sank into his skin and the magic worked its way through his bloodstream.

He filled his weapons belt with knives, daggers and unactivated seraph blades before grabbing a quiver and arrows.

“Meet at the entrance in five.” He threw over his shoulder before heading back to his room.

Once there, he attempted to pull on a gear jacket and dial Magnus’s number at the same time.

“Hello, darling.” Magnus’s voice finally crooned out while he was pulling on his heavy hunting boots.

“Hey. Sorry, but I think I’m going to be a bit late for dinner tonight.” 

“Why?” Magnus sounded unamused and Alec found himself wincing a bit at the tone. 

Alec sighed. “I need to take care of some minor demons in Manhattan.”

“ _Minor demons?_ Shouldn’t a perk of being an Institute head be that you can assign _other_ people to take care of lower level threats?”

“I know this is really annoying, I’m sorry again, but it should be really quick. In and out, I promise.”

It was Magnus’s turn to sigh. “Fine. But don’t leave me waiting for too long.”

“I won’t.” He hung up and grabbed his bow.

He was ready to lead the mission.

* * *

Less than an hour later and Alec felt like he was on fire.

It was the only thing his mind could register.

The pain seared through his throat, choking him, down his shoulder and through his rib cage.

There seemed to be a chorus of screams filling the air, long, hoarse and barely human. He had no idea where they were coming from.

He barely even knew who he was.

Everything was too much.

Too bright.

Too hot.  

Until suddenly there was nothing.

Just darkness.

* * *

It was all his fault.

They had rushed things because they knew that it was supposed to be a quick mission.

Alec had still wanted to do a thorough scan of the perimeter and the hallways of the abandoned building but Jace had convinced him not to.

He was usually all for long demon hunts that dragged on for hours, the feeling of ichor burning through his gear and the clean up that followed- by the Angel just thinking about all the clean up he would have to do was enough to make Jace shiver in anticipation- but his head was pounding and he felt vaguely nauseous. He had felt like this ever since he had died and somehow been brought back to life by Clary.

He was sure that if he was honest about what happened to Alec, his brother would have let him sit this mission out. Who could really blame someone who had fucking _died_ if they wanted to lie down and take a break from missions for a while? Alec definitely would have given him as much time as he needed. But because Jace was stupid and he had been through worse- Valentine had made him train with broken bones and concussions- he figured this was nothing he couldn't deal with as well.

But even he had to admit that he had acted a bit more reckless than usual.

They had done a very quick scan of the perimeter and just gone in weapons blazing.

But it had worked out because things hadn’t immediately gone to shit.

They had had enough time to kick in a few doors, find absolutely nothing, and for Jace to remark that this mission was even easier than they had initially been expecting.

 _That_ was when things had gone to shit.

The ceiling caved in and demons fell down practically on top of them, surrounding them until the only thing that provided any light in the hallway was the dull shine of their seraph blades.

“Guess I spoke too soon,” Jace said, still completely unaffected by the entire situation, and leaping forward to attack the demon closest to him.

His eyesight had pin holed until the only thing he was aware of was the swinging of his blades. When he was in battle, they weren’t just weapons, they were an extension of his body and felt as natural in his hands as a paintbrush might be to a painter. As much as he hated Valentine, he couldn't deny that the man had taught him well. 

He didn’t have to turn his head to know that Alec was wielding a long seraph blade similar to his own. The combat was way too close to use his bow and arrows but contrary to what some people might think, Alec was just as deadly and accurate wielding a sword as he was with his favored weapon. He heard the smallest shifting in Alec’s breath and knew what his brother was planning to do.

Jace dropped to his knees, throwing one of his blades into the air, while Alec effortlessly did a backflip, caught the blade and slashed out in both directions, killing all the demons in front of them before his feet had even touched the ground. They turned around in time to see a large flash of light as Izzy wielded her whip in a large arch effectively taking out the rest of the demons left in the space.

They were all breathing hard, and Jace’s gear shirt was sticking to his skin uncomfortably because of all the sweat that had gathered on his chest and arms but the mission had gone fine.

After another quick surveying of the hallway, and seeing that it was completely clear, Jace had taken the lead on exiting the building, trusting that his siblings would follow behind. Seeing that the alley was clear as well Jace started to sheath his blades. Now that the adrenaline from the battle was starting to wane, the headache from earlier was starting to return and he really just wanted to lie down. Before he could take another step, he heard Alec yell out and he was being pushed to the side.

He barely had time to look up and see Alec get bitten by a demon that was definitely not one of the minor ones they had come here to hunt. It disappeared a couple seconds later, Alec’s seraph blade going straight through its chest but it was too late. The damage had already been done and Alec was crumbling to the ground, convulsing.

Jace tasted blood in his mouth.

He wasn’t sure if it was because of their parabatai bond or if he had just bitten through his lip.

He felt his knees buckle and he was falling to the ground, his head at the perfect angle to see Alec’s mouth foaming with blackish blood.

He attempted to lift himself only to cry out in pain and fall back down again.

Jace had been hurt before, that was to be expected in this line of work, hell, that was to be expected growing up with Valentine as a father. He was no stranger to pain. He could handle it.

Or at least he could handle his own.

There was something completely different about Alec’s pain though because it was always a double-edged sword of both physical and emotional.

He felt fire, more intense than anything he had ever experienced (besides probably dying) right over his hip bone, it consumed his entire body and he realized that he was screaming.

The pain built and built until it suddenly broke off and then there was nothing.

 _Nothing_.

Not even the dull hum that was usually always there.

There was always a constant humming that seemed to come from deep inside of him, something that felt very distinctly like Alec and let him know that he was never alone, no matter where he was or how terrible life was being. But now he felt nothing at all.

He knew that if he could move his hand to touch his face it would be soaked with tears. Alec was the most important person in the world to him. He was his brother, his best friend and their souls were tied together. He could read Alec like an open book from the smallest twitching of his mouth when he was amused but didn’t want to show it, to the way he held his body ramrod straight with his arms behind his back when he got nervous to hide the shaking of his hands. Alec shot down his dumb ideas before Jace could even open his mouth and he was the only one that could keep him calm when all he wanted to do was cry and scream and train until his hands were bloody and broken.

He couldn’t lose that.

He couldn’t lose Alec.

He wouldn’t be a person.

He wouldn’t be anything.

He clutched his right side, directly over his parabatai mark, and felt himself shaking. This couldn’t be happening.

He couldn’t make sense of his thoughts. His head seemed to just be filled with images and snippets of sound, all of Alec. The day they met, the day the Lightwoods officially decided to adopt him, the day they became parabatai, all of their big moments, small moments and everything in between.

He couldn’t pull up his shirt to check if his mark was still there. If it was gone it would break him but he was already feeling pretty damn broken looking at Alec, pale and crumpled on the ground with his own blood starting to dry on the skin of his neck and face.

He was only brought out of his head by the sound of Izzy shouting, “Magnus!”

Jace managed to sit up in time to see Isabelle throw herself at the High Warlock of Brooklyn who had just stepped out of a shimmering portal.

Magnus’s eyes surveyed the scene, taking in all three Shadowhunter’s and making a sound that almost sounded like he was choking before holding Isabelle out at arm’s length.

“Isabelle- what happened?” He looked like he was trying to remain calm in this situation but Jace knew Magnus’s mind was probably in the same place his was.

“It was only supposed to be minor demons but then this one just appeared out of nowhere and he- he- just help him please.”

Magnus nodded once and walked over to Alec until he was hovering right over him.

He waved a ring-clad hand over Alec’s body and grimaced deeply.

Jace felt his heart drop to his stomach, thinking that perhaps it was already too late but then Magnus began to chant.

His voice was deep and guttural and it sounded like no language Jace had ever heard before.

He brought his hands up and began to draw glowing runes into the air. Each one burned as bright as a flame before disappearing into sparks that floated down onto Alec. After a couple of seconds, the magic began to form a cocoon of sorts until Alec was surrounded by a glowing orange field of energy. Magnus lifted his hands and his brother began to rise into the air.

The warlock gestured toward the still open portal with one hand.  

“Come on. I’m going to need you two.”

He walked through the portal, Alec floating behind him, without looking back to check if they would follow.

Because of course, they would.

* * *

Jace had expected them to end up at Magnus’s apartment but when he stumbled through the portal with his ears ringing, he realized he had no idea where they were. He opened his mouth to ask but no sounds came out.

He simply stood on his shaking legs and tried to take everything in. They were in a living room full of dark furniture and simple artworks: black and white paintings, sculptures of human forms on pedestals, Alec floating in the air looking pale as death.

Magnus pulled out his phone and it ended up floating in front of him as he called someone.

The person on the other end of the call barely had time to greet him before Magnus was already speaking.

“I know that you are at work and busy saving lives but I have a life that is legitimately on the line here.”

Jace heard a long-suffering sigh. “Where?”

“Your apartment.”

“I’ll be there soon.” The person said and the line went dead.

Magnus’s phone floated its way back into his pocket and he led them to another room- an office of sorts. There was a desk shoved into a corner and the walls were lined with bookshelves. Only half of the shelves actually held books while the other half held rows and rows of jars of all colors and sizes, overflowing with different things from dark liquids to feathers to scales to what looked like teeth.

And of course, there was a bone white operating table in the middle of the room.

Magnus strode in like he owned the place and gently lowered Alec to the table. The bubble that had surrounded him shimmered for a second before finally popping and Magnus fell back against the desk.

When Jace looked at him, really looked at him, he saw that the warlock’s limbs were shaking and his face was pale. It looked like it was all he could do just to stay awake. Jace knew that Magnus would do whatever he could do to keep Alec alive but Jace wondered what the cost would be to Magnus himself.

He also wondered if he had the strength to stop Magnus if the cost was too high.

It would mean he would be able to see Alec look at him disapprovingly again, hear the sound of his brothers laugh, hard-earned but big enough to fill a room, or feel what it was like to rest his head against Alec’s shoulder, breathe in and just know that his brother, his older brother, his parabatai, his best friend would always be there for him. Even if it meant jumping in front of demons or ripping his soul in half or following him to the gates of hell. Alec had given him so so much and he couldn't help but feel like he didn't deserve it. He hoped he would be able to stop Magnus if the warlock wanted to get all self-sacrifice-y, but he also hoped Alec wasn’t that far gone that it would have to come to that.

* * *

The person on the other end of the phone and the owner of this house turned out to be a tall slim woman dressed in bright pink scrubs. The scrubs, though an eyesore, weren’t the thing that drew his attention though, it was the hair which was a striking shade of white and her skin which was a deep blue.

“I’m Catarina, welcome to my home, now tell me about this boy who is dying right in the middle of said home.” She said it dismissively as if this was all nothing new.

She walked over to Alec, right next to where Izzy was bent over him, her eyes were wet but she seemed to be keeping the tears back through sheer force of will.

Catarina pressed a finger to Alec’s neck, right next to one of the deep teeth marks that had since turned as black as their gear. Alec didn’t react but Jace did. He felt the pain again almost as if she was digging her nails into him and winced.

But he wasn’t upset, quite the opposite actually. Feeling Alec’s pain meant that they were still connected. At least for now.

Catarina drew back her hand and sniffed her finger. “Hmm. This poison is impressive. And fast acting. He’s slipping fast but we might still be able to help him.”

Jace tried not to focus on the word ‘might’ and only ‘help him.’ They were going to help him. Alec was going to be fine.

He had to be fine.

Catarina said something to Magnus in a language that Jace didn’t understand and the man stood up from his position at the desk, he had been flipping through some spell books before Catarina had arrived, and held out his hand to Jace. “Give me your strength.”

Jace didn’t hesitate for a second to thrust his hand into Magnus’s grip. There was heat, almost unbearable heat before Magnus pulled away as if he has been burned. He gave Jace a look and didn’t say anything but Jace could practically hear what he was thinking loud and clear:

_What is wrong with you?_

Jace rubbed his hand on his pants trying to fight off his impulse to curl them into fists and turned away.

He didn’t know.

He didn’t know what was wrong with him.

He had died and he had come back changed somehow but he couldn’t just say that while his brother was like this.

So he clenched his teeth. “Izzy.” He said and immediately she looked up from where she had been stroking Alec’s hair. She hadn’t seen what just happened and he was glad.

“I need your strength, please,” Magnus said sounding weary. Wordlessly they switched places so that Jace was standing next to Catarina. She cast him a sideways glance that was a watered-down version of the one Magnus had given him but quickly turned away to focus on Alec again.

Jace felt his fingers finally curl up into the fists he had been avoiding, his nails pressed into the skin of his palms to the point of pain.

Jace just stood there as the two warlocks had bustled around consulting spell books and creating potions, chanting various spells and lighting candles. Jace wanted to help but didn’t know how. Magnus kept coming back to Izzy, getting small bursts of energy before going back to whatever task he was doing. They didn’t even look at him.

After what felt like years of just standing still, listening to the pounding of his heart and trying to ignore the ache in his entire body, Catarina finally acknowledged him in the same way one would call for an animal.

“You. The parabatai. Come here. Drink this,” He chose to not take offense as he walked over to the desk and took the dark liquid that was offered to him. He quirked an eyebrow. Normally he would have been sarcastic and flippant but he wasn’t in the mood for it right now.

“It’s to let him draw on your strength. He’s going to need as much as possible right now. We’re about to get to the ugly part.”

Jace chose not to question what the ‘ugly part’ was as he drank down the liquid that tasted suspiciously like blood and dirt. He watched Magnus gently lift Alec’s head and open his mouth while Izzy gently poured the same liquid down his throat. It was the first time Jace had seen Alec move since he jumped in front of him and the small pitiful swallows looked pained.

Jace felt nothing until Magnus gently took his hand, no shocked or pained reactions this time around, and led his hand to Alec’s. Alec’s hand was ice cold in his own but from that point of contact, the iciness began to travel upward through his arm, his shoulders and on and on until it consumed his whole body.

After the coldness dissipated, what was left in its wake was a pain. Intense pain in his neck, right shoulder and all the way down his side. It wasn’t his own pain it was- Alec’s. He could feel every last inch of Alec’s body as if it was his own. It was as if they were one soul in two bodies. Absolutely and truly connected. Magnus still had his ring clad fingers over theirs.

“Whatever happens, don’t let go.” Jace nodded and laced their fingers together.

Alec’s heart- or was it his own? Was pounding in both of their chests. The second heart soon caught up to its rhythm when Catarina and Magnus both began to chant. They each wielded sharp knives which they used to slice into their palms and create a circle of blood on the floor. The flame from the candles had reached dangerous looking heights and Jace felt sweat break out all over his body.

Catarina reached for a bowl and both warlocks took turns bleeding into it, their chanting beginning to grow in volume until they were practically screaming. Catarina poured the contents of the bowl all over Alec’s neck and chest and despite all the blood that had spilled, the liquid was white and sticky and uncomfortable against their skin. The chanting began to slow and lower in volume until they finally seemed to be at the end.

For a moment there was nothing but silence, all of them seemed to be holding their breath in anticipation of what was happening next. Then Magnus fell forward, his breath leaving him in one big exhale as he placed on hand on Alec’s chest and the other on his forehead. He murmured something in a voice that was too low for Jace to hear and his fingers began to trace patterns into the sticky goo that was covering Alec’s pale skin. Jace wanted to let out a groan of pain when Magnus’s fingers touched Alec’s wounds but managed to bite it back.

Magnus eventually stopped and Jace let out a relieved breath as the other man stood up with great effort and nodded to Catarina.

Jace was too busy looking at Alec’s face for any changes and trying to focus on breathing for the both of them that he missed Catarina’s movements but he sure as hell felt them.

Screaming suddenly filled the room. Both his and Alec’s because she was  _ripping_ into them. Her nails reaching into their skin and _tearing_ away their flesh. Everywhere that the white substance had covered was being torn away as if Alec’s skin was nothing more than wrapping paper.

Jace wanted to push her away, he wanted to vomit, he wanted to succumb to the pain and just let it consume him.

The last option turned out to be the easiest one because one moment he was screaming and begging her to _stop, please stop_ and clawing at his skin just trying to do anything to escape the pain and the next moment, he was falling. He wasn’t sure where only knew that it was dark and quiet and that the pain couldn’t touch him there.

He just let go and fell.

* * *

Alec was dreaming.

He dreamt of angel wings and Max’s baby toys that he was too sentimental to throw out and the musical sound of Izzy’s laughter and the way Jace’s hair reflected sunlight. He dreamt of golden eyes and equally as tan skin against his own, keeping him warm. He dreamt about his own body and what it felt like to smile, what it felt like to fight and what it felt like to

fall.

* * *

 Alec was aware that he was screaming once he closed his lips and was able to stop. His breath was coming in pants, his heart was racing and the entire right side of his body felt raw as if he had been dipped in acid but besides from that... he was awake and more importantly, was alive.

It took a while for him to remember that he had eyes and even longer before he was able to get them to blink open. He was greeted with a blinding white light and regretted his entire endeavor immediately. He groaned and went to close his eyes again. Where was he? What had happened? He remembered the hunt and how it had been going well until it wasn’t. He remembered jumping in front of Jace and-

“Jace-” He gasped out, his throat feeling hoarse and he tried to sit up but was forcibly pushed back onto the table that he was lying on.

“Easy there sweetheart, we only just got you back.” Came an easy voice from above him. Alec opened his eyes again to see his boyfriend.

“Magnus. What-what happened?”

Magnus smirked at him but Alec could see that his skin was ashen and his hands were shaking.

“You decided that you would rather dance with death than go on a date with me, you silly Nephilim.” His voice was light as he tapped a finger against Alec’s nose. Alec recognized the tightness of his lips and his golden cat eyes that he was apparently too exhausted to glamour.

Alec immediately felt guilty, not just for missing another one of their dates but also for almost dying again, and having Magnus waste his magic on him, and generally for being an all around shit boyfriend.

Magnus must have been able to see his thought process written across his face, he had never been great at hiding his emotions especially with Magnus who seemed to be able to read him like a book.

“But it’s fine because it won’t happen again. Right?” He said while leaning down over Alec so that by the time he made it to his one-word question, he was mere centimeters away from Alec’s lips. He had to remind himself to breathe with his boyfriend so close to him. Alec nodded quickly.

He didn’t want to blatantly lie to Magnus’s face. He was a Shadowhunter. ‘Dancing with death’ as Magnus had put it was just a part of the job, but if Magnus wanted to ignore that part of his line of work then who was Alec to take that away from him?

At least until the next time he got hurt.

“Good.” Magnus leaned in to brush their lips together in a feather-light touch that left Alec wanting more but Magnus was already moving out of reach.

And focusing his attention on the floor where Jace seemed to be asleep. Except for the dark circles under his eyes, that had become a familiar sight since Jace and Clary had killed Valentine, his brother didn’t look hurt so Alec decided not to worry.

Magnus prodded the blond boy with the tip of his boot. “Time to get up Shadowhunter. I don’t have enough magic to heal you too.”

Jace groaned from his position on the floor but his eyes snapped open finding Alec’s almost instantly. He sprang up from the floor as graceful as ever and then as equally ungraceful promptly landed on top of his chest. Alec wheezed out in pain but tried to ignore the burning feeling as he took on the familiar weight of Jace and wrapped his arms around his brother.

“I thought you were gone,” Jace said, whisper-soft so that only the two of them could hear.

“I’m right here,” Alec responded, equally as quiet. They stayed like that for a moment before he felt a hand shoving them.

“Are you done hogging our brother Jace? You weren’t the only one who was worried about him, you know.” He and Jace both looked up to see Izzy wiping her eyes with annoyance. He knew she hated being emotional like that. He must have been in really bad shape.

“There’s plenty of room over here for you too, Iz.” He said, holding out one of his arms. She instantly came over to him and tucked her head into the crook of his neck, one hand curling into what was left of his gear shirt.

It was suddenly just like when they were kids, all curling up in Alec’s bed after a long day of training or after one of them had had a nightmare or if they just did not want to be alone. And Alec didn’t realize how much he had missed this, this closeness until now.

A light hand settled on top of one of his and Alec was reminded of another, new, closeness that he now had. He brought Magnus’s ring-clad hand up to his lips to kiss it and then just kept it there. Alec was tired and the weight of his siblings was starting to make it a bit difficult to breathe but he was happy. He was happy and surrounded by love and alive.

That was all that anyone could really ask for.

That and maybe a shower.

 


End file.
